Massager Jeanie

Massager Jeanie
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To Dance with Jim His Last Dance

Friday Night, Week Before Christmas, 1999

This night I arrived a little before the crowd, just minutes before the tables with stools near the small dance floor were taken. Harvelle's, a popular Santa Monica night spot which draws an upscale crowd, is known as "The Home of the Blues, R&B, Funk, and Rock" with live music and dancing every night. With its no-smoking environment and sounds for both the ears and the feet, it is a pleasant place to spend an evening. I go for the listening and the dancing.

After enjoying a dance with a young man, I wove my way back through newly arrived patrons to my carefully chosen seat. After a sip of my Pellegrino, I felt compelled to return to the edge of the dance floor. My rational thought was to take my turn with one of the regulars, John, a trained dancer who arrived some twenty minutes earlier. I noticed him and a man I had not seen before -- both the same vintage, about 50, and the same height, about 5'8", but John as light as and the unknown man as heavy as that frame can hold.

John changed partners on the dance floor, so I made eye contact with this other man who, like John, had been dancing with a variety of partners since his arrival. We danced and exchanged pleasantries. We laughed. We smiled. I noticed that his flesh tone was similar to mine, light and peachy; his eyes as intense as my own blue eyes, but brown. It was obvious that he loved to dance. He led adeptly; I followed easily. In the middle of our dance, he commented, "You'll probably need to take your jacket off because you'll get warm." I smiled, knowing that likely I would very soon peel it off, but for the time being the fan above the dance floor was keeping me cool.

At the end of the dance, I turned toward the band to acknowledge the musicians with my applause. When I turned my focus back to my partner, I saw that he was no longer standing beside me, but was face down on the floor. The other dancers and I assumed he was joking. But not so. The band stopped. Time stopped. This time held all eternity -- a time that can be long or short by the clock. Someone called for help while six of us (including staff, John, and a patron who is a registered nurse) said encouraging words and touched him. I allowed others to attend to him on a physical basis, and focused my attention at another level.

I put my hand on his back and asked silently "Are you going to die?" to which came the answer: "It is time." My thoughts raced with a series of follow-up questions: "Time for what? Time to live? Time to die? Time to dance?" I reminded myself to breathe. My impulse "to do" something shifted back to the consciousness "to be" with this moment. I recognized that to be a non-anxious presence was more important now than any action I might take. My inner guidance confirmed that his spirit was very much alive, but was no longer in his body. I felt his spiritual presence more strongly than I had earlier. My fearlessness of physical death and my previous experiences of observing the process of transition from physical to nonphysical anchored me in blessing the richness of this moment.

Words of encouragement and gentle touches came to this man on the floor from those in the inner circle; those in the outer circles bore witness to the event. Drawn together for entertainment in this intimate space, we found ourselves joined by the invisible web of human kindness with varied reflections and perspectives on life and death.

In the muted sounds of the club, I picked up odds and ends of information. Echoed through the room was the knowledge that no one present knew this man's name. Staff confirmed to each other that he was not drinking. A gold ring on his left hand announced he was married. In the absence of facts, I speculated on his circumstances. Perhaps he was an out-of-town business person unwilling to fight the Friday night outbound traffic at LAX. Perhaps he lived in Chicago or Boston, with a wife and children not expecting him home until sometime the next day. A staff member tapped me on the shoulder, bringing me out of my speculation, and signaled that I was to move aside for the police and paramedics. I slipped back into linear time and realized that, by the clock, their arrival was swift.

I moved to the outer circle, but not for long. The staff pointed me out to a police officer who asked for my identification. In my tiny purse I carried only my keys, my driver's license, and some cash. I learned from the early morning jogging club the importance of carrying identification when going out to walk or run, just in case...... Going to a bar or buying wine, of course, I carry my picture ID for that added hope that I will get carded. This current scenario was one that I had not imagined as reason to carry proof of identity.

I followed the police officer who carried my license in his hands. He was young, handsome, gentle, and empathetic. Unhurried, he copied the information from my card, asking me to confirm that each bit was still correct. Harvelle's staff also took my name and telephone number.

As the paramedics performed their duties, the patrons continued to keep a respectful vigil. Although I knew this man's body no longer held his spirit, the attendants kept massaging his heart as they carried him away. Perhaps they did not want to announce the finality to the Friday night crowd or perhaps they did not want to give up hope or perhaps they were following predetermined procedures.

When the band returned to make their sounds, I vacillated between staying and leaving. To stay and dance felt more honoring of the happenings; to leave too soon seemed to discount the evening's events. The crowd was expanded rather than diminished. I danced with John and waited until the end of the set to leave, about midnight. Outside the club, the bouncer (a 300 pound hunk) said he had something for me: three passes for my next visit to Harvelle's. I smiled at the graciousness in the hands that hold such physical strength. My only words "thank you" were transmitted through the wordless energy field of our shared experience.

Two Days Later, Sunday

While walking on Santa Monica's Third Street Promenade, I found myself face to face with a police officer handing me a candy cane. He noted my hesitancy to take the candy and said with gentle authority that I had to take it. I acquiesced with a playful smile that matched his, and offered a bargain: I would take it in exchange for some information. I told him that I was at Harvelle's on Friday. He stopped any need for further explanation when he revealed that he was on dispatch that night. I asked how I could make it known that I was available to speak with the man's wife or anyone else in the family, if they desired. I identified myself as the last one dancing with him, that my name and contact information were part of the police record.

Home for five minutes, the owner of Harvelle's telephoned to ask me to call the family. This nameless man and his wife, whom I had been carrying in my heart for two days, now had names: Jim and Victoria. Not from out of town, they lived locally. A friend handling phone calls told me Victoria would return my call the next day.

The Next Day, Monday

Victoria and I spoke for an hour by phone in a remarkable dialogue. She confirmed that she and Jim love/loved to dance. She kept correcting her language, changing references to Jim to the past tense rather than the present tense which had become so familiar in their 18-year marriage. Friday night Victoria had to work (she is an emergency room physician) so Jim went without her to scout Harvelle's for a future visit together. Their other dance buddies had planned to go with him, but in the end Jim went without anyone who knew him.

I shared with Victoria every detail I could recall from that night; she reciprocated by confirming information about Jim that I had intuited. Jim and Victoria had a son and daughter, ages 8 and 10. He had several physical conditions which prompted him to decide to dance to maintain his health. In addition, he created a contract with the Universe that he not live any part of his life as an invalid. He was active to the last moment. He was totally alive until he died.

I was touched by her words as she thanked me for being an angel for Jim and for holding a space of calmness during the event. It took a while following our conversation for me to synthesize all that we verbalized, though I was left with no doubt that Jim knew he was going to die that night.

I declined to attend Jim's memorial service on the next day because I had a client scheduled in a time slot that would make it impossible. Later when the client cancelled, I knew where I was supposed to be.

The Next Day, Tuesday

The synagogue was filled with those who loved and cherished Jim. They were not there in perfunctory attendance. Before I could spot someone I thought might be Victoria, a comely woman approached me, commenting that I was standing alone. I explained that I knew no one there, identifying myself as "the woman who was the last to dance with Jim." She embraced me warmly as she introduced herself as Jim's mother. A brief interchange indicated that Victoria had already conveyed much of our conversation. As I approached Victoria, pointed out by Jim's mother, our eyes meet and she asked "Are you Jeanie?"

At the memorial service, I heard stories of Jim's capacity to love, ability to inspire, and the expansiveness of his soul. I contemplated the enigma that he left this physical life in a place where nobody knew him on this earth plane. With so many close friends and family members, he chose strangers to be with him in the end of this life. I believe Jim would appreciate and even encourage us to speculate on this situation, a mystery that sweetens his memory.

Today

Jim's story has not ended simply because he no longer uses a body that is familiar to family and friends. He has touched many persons in his life and in his death: those he knew and those he did not know by name.

It was a special honor to be present, to be a witness to his passage, and to dance with Jim his last dance.

About the Author

Copyright © 2006 Marshall House Jeanie Marshall, Empowerment Consultant and Coach with Marshall House, produces Guided Meditations on CD albums and MP3 downloads and writes extensively on subjects related to personal development and empowerment.
Voice of Jeanie Marshall, http://www.jmvoice.com

High Blood Pressure and Tai Chi Therapy

Way back in 2003, the Journal of Alternative and Complimentary Medicine's Oct. 9th issue reported a study finding that Tai Chi "could decrease blood pressure and results in favorable lipid profile changes and improve subjects' anxiety status. Therefore, Tai Chi could be used as an alternative modality in treating patients with mild hypertension, with a promising economic effect." This study laid out a way to save our society, perhaps billions of dollars annually, and possibly save some patients with mild chronic hypertension the potential negative side effects of chronic lifelong medication. However, this largely hasn't occurred.

I caught a glimpse why when I was staying in the beautiful mountain town of Otavala, Ecuador, with a woman known for her knowledge of traditional Indian medicines. A tour of young American medical students stopped here to listen and learn from the Indian woman's tour of her herbal gardens. As I followed them, I asked a group of young bright medical students if they were aware that Tai Chi was found to reduce high blood pressure. One lovely young woman replied, "Oh, yes, I've heard that, but I would never prescribe it."

I asked why, and she responded that she couldn't because she didn't know if it would work. Although Tai Chi studies do show that Tai Chi indeed helps lower high blood pressure, it is true that it does not reduce it in every person. However, it is also true that every drug prescription does not work on every person either. I suggested to the young medical student that she consider that many times I've been to the doctor, and he's pulled out a prescription pad and explained, "Let's give this a try, and see how it works for you, and if it doesn't do the job, we'll try something else." Most of us are familiar with this, and by the confused look on the student's face, I'm assuming her memory banks were bringing up similar images.

So, why are our medical universities giving students the impression that they should not be prescribing Tai Chi, since we know it can help lower high blood pressure for many, who if it is successful with them, can enjoy a lifetime free of chronic and costly medications? And not only do that, but offer a plethora of GOOD SIDE EFFECTS including a stronger immune system and healthier respiratory system. This is a deep and important question we need to be asking as patients and consumers, and health professionals must begin asking this question regularly in order to fulfill the duties of their Hippocratic oath. For, today we have even a much better understanding of Tai Chi's potential than we did a few years ago, so ignorance or inconclusive data is not an acceptable explanation from our medical universities that train our future doctors, without teaching them about Tai Chi research, and what it portends for their future patients.

Today, we are clearer on exactly why Tai Chi is such a powerful therapy for high blood pressure sufferers. In a March 17, 2005, article by the Mayo Clinic staff posted at mayoclinic.com they lay out what a "stress response" is, and the effects it has on the body. This is at the core of high blood pressure problems and the physical changes chronic stress responses illicite that creates or aggravates hypertensive conditions.

In their article, they explain that a stress response, or "fight or flight" reaction involves our pituitary gland releasing adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH), which sets a domino effect signaling other glands to produce additional hormones, such as adrenal glands which flood the blood stream with stress hormones, such as "cortisol" and "adrenaline."

When ordinary life's daily frustrations trigger this effect over and over again, the results can be damaging to the mind and body. Many of us experience this domino effect of triggers and hormones daily, which is why about 1/3 of Americans, or over 90 million Americans, suffer from high blood pressure.

Cutting edge scientists like Dr. Herbert Benson, President of the Mind/Body Institute at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston, are discovering a stunning reality through their research. In a wonderful article by Jeanie Lerche Davis at WebMD Medical News entitled The Mysterious 'Medication' of Meditation (http://my.webmd.com/content/article/25/1728_ 57992.htm), she writes of how such researchers are discovering that "meditation can indeed be medication - creating long lasting physiciolgical effects that reduce high blood pressure and even help unclog arteries to reverse heart disease."

Dr. Benson, who is also associate professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, sought to prove how this effect could be shown objectively, and had five long-time meditation practitioners take MRI brain scans while meditating. Dr. Benson informed WebMD in the aforementioned article by Davis, "There was a striking quietude across the entire brain which was documented through MRI . . . The areas of the brain that became active from that quietude were those that control metabolism, heart rate, etc., . . . We knew meditation caused a relaxation response, but we couldn't prove it. We knew that if you thought in a certain way, with repetition, that physiologic changes would occur in the body. Here now is proof that mind, in the form of repetition, is affecting the brain, which affects the body . . . "

Stroke Magazine reported on a study funded by the National Institutes of Health, conducted by Dr. Amparo Castillo-Richmond, from the Maharishi University, more specifically on high blood pressure afflicting black people. The meditating group saw a reduction in the thickness of one of the arteries that supplied blood to the brain. Which indicates that blood flow is increasing. The group only using diet and exercise saw their artery walls getting thicker, which indicated that less blood was flowing through to the brain. This finding led Dr. Castillo-Richmond to make the profoundly exciting assertion, "It's possible to reverse heart disease through meditation." In fact, not only hypertension, but up to 90% of other illnesses sending us to the doctor are being caused by stress, according to Dr. Herbert Benson. Which makes Dr. Benson's and Dr. Castillo-Richmond's findings that meditative techniques can so dramatically alter our stress producing "fight or flight" response in healthy ways even more wonderful.

Dr. Benson explains, that the relaxation response triggered by repetitive forms [like tai chi, yoga, etc.] can result in decreased metabolism, heart rate, breathing rate, blood pressure, and also slower brain waves." Benson asserts that it is the repetitive nature of acts like praying the rosary, yoga, or tai chi's physical repetitive muscular actions that provides the profound hope for reducing anxiety, mild and moderate depression, anger and hostility, hypertension, cardiac irregularities, and all forms of pain, which are made worse by stress.

This concept of Tai Chi being an effective tool for reducing or even avoiding incidence of high blood pressure or other illnesses all together, is echoed elsewhere. Mayoclinic.com also recommends Tai Chi for relaxation training in an article entitled, "Relax: Techniques to help you achieve tranquility" which also explains why relaxation is important and what you might experience by practicing tools that will help you relax.

They detail how you can improve body responses to stress, such as: Slowing your heart rate; Reducing blood pressure; Slowing your breathing rate; Reducing the need for oxygen; Increasing blood flow to the major muscles; Lessening muscle tension.

They go on to explain that practicing relaxation techniques may help you experience: Fewer symptoms of illness, such as headaches, nausea, diarrhea and pain; Few emotional responses such as anger, crying, anxiety, apprehension and frustration; More energy; Improved concentration; Greater ability to handle problems; More efficiency in daily activities. So, time and time again as we begin to examine one particular benefit of Tai Chi, such as lowering high blood pressure, we see a whole universe of potential opening up before us.

An article from Archives of Internal Medicine, as reported on NBC's local WCAU Health (http://wcau-tvhealth.ip2m.com/index.cfm?pt=itemDetail&Item_ ID=112735&Site_Cat_ID=77) explained a Tai Chi research program at Tufts-New England Medical Center in Boston revealed a great deal. The article authors wrote, "Overall, these studies reported that long-term Tai Chi practice had favorable effects on the promotion of balance control, flexibility and cardiovascular fitness and reduced the risk of falls in elders . . . Cardiovascular and respiratory function improvements were noted in healthy people and those who had undergone coronary artery bypass surgery as well as people with heart failure, hypertension, acute myocardial infarction, arthritis and multiple sclerosis . . . Benefit was also found for balance, strength, and flexibility in older subjects; falls in frail elderly subjects; and pain, stress and anxiety in healthy subjects." They add the actual ways that Tai Chi provides these benefits are not well known.

The fact is that less than .5% of the National Institute of Health's budget goes to research alternative therapies, leaving yoga, meditation, tai chi, massage, herbal therapy, aroma therapy, and the entire massive field of alternative health systems to struggle over .5%, or a little over $100 million of the $28 billion (approx.) annual budget. Given the above studies, it boggles the mind that such a small portion of the health research dollars are going to Tai Chi.

To recap, about 1/3 of the American population suffers high blood pressure. Tai Chi is proven to be a beneficial therapy that not only has no bad side effects, but dramatically improves immune function, respiratory function, lowers the incidence of anxiety and depression, and profoundly improves the balance of practitioners. Tai Chi does more, but for our purposes here these profound realities are enough to show exactly why it is truly unbelievable that Tai Chi is getting so little scrutiny in medical research dollars, when it can save so many from chronic suffering and perhaps some from a lifetime of chronic costly medications.

It is time we all began to ask the question that all good consumers should ask, "What is the best way/product for my health?" If Tai Chi is that product, the next question is, "Why isn't every physician offering it as an option to their patients with hypertension, as a prescription?" "Why aren't all insurance policies covering such prescriptions for Tai Chi?" Ask and ye shall receive. We must become informed and demanding health consumers, in order to get the best health options available.

This article does not advocate self-treatment, and encourages all to make health choices in conjunction with their physician. However, if your physician is close-minded to anything but a certain group of health options, even when research indicates your choices may be wider, than it is time to have a good talk with your physician about possibly widening your options.

About the Author

Bill Douglas is the Tai Chi Expert at DrWeil.com, Founder of World T'ai Chi & Qigong Day (held in 50 nations each year), and has authored and co-authored several books including a #1 best selling Tai Chi book "The Complete Idiot's Guide to T'ai Chi & Qigong." Bill's been a Tai Chi source for The Wall Street Journal, New York Times, etc. You can learn more about Tai Chi & Qigong, and also contact Bill Douglas at
http://www.worldtaichiday.org
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Tags: .com, Acne Blemish Control, bed, body, break, care, Cellulite Treatments, fast paced society, lang, Laser Hair Removal, Massage, massager, no doubt, online, Removal, rub, skin, skin care services, skin care technology, skin wellness, source article, stretch mark, surgery, technology, time